


Wish Upon Something- A Christmas Story

by Nachtnebel



Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (TV 2003), Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - All Media Types
Genre: Action, Angst, But with a happy ending, Christmas Eve, Comfort, Emotional, Gen, Mikey saves christmas again, Mikey-centric - Freeform, Optimism, Secret Santa, a little late but enjoy anyway, negative thinking, slight form of depression
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-24
Updated: 2019-01-24
Packaged: 2019-10-15 14:43:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,135
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17530661
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nachtnebel/pseuds/Nachtnebel
Summary: He was running completely out of breath, his red cape floating wild with the wind as he was followed by loud noises and steps right behind him. How did he get into this situation? Just why did he have to prove himself? Prove them wrong? He should’ve stayed at home, celebrating with the others where it was nice, comfy and warm. But NO, he just had to be here, running for his life in the cold snow, wet, tired and injured just because he only wanted to help and do the right thing! Or perhaps because he was a coward ...Yet it all had started with this simple question: “Mikey, what do you wish for Christmas?”





	Wish Upon Something- A Christmas Story

“Mikey, what do you wish for Christmas?”

 

Exactly that was the question that had leaded to him, sitting on the rooftop of a building, freezing his shell off while he stared into the sky waiting impatiently. The story behind this scene was as simple and silly just as it was crazy and complicated at the same time. But that wasn’t something new for the Turtle who called himself the unpredictable - and most handsome - one.  
During his observation, icy cold wind carried snowflakes into the night, making him pull his red cape deeper to cover his face. He began to blow little clouds out of hot breath into the air to pass the time a little. Last time he looked at his Shell-Cell it was about half an hour before midnight. But he would endure till sunrise if he had to. Or maybe at least till 6 a.m.  
If just something, anything, would finally happen! Why did nobody came?  
  
“Come on, man”, he stammered trough rattling teeth. If his brothers knew what he was up to, they would probably hand his shell to him. It’ll most likely ended up this way regardless if he found evidence or not so it was worth it. Moreover Mikey’s intent was practically announced and, to quote Raph: “Yeah, sure. Try if you want, Knucklehead” already sounded kinda like a challenge in his head so he did it.  
“Really, that old man could start to show up by now”, the orange clad Turtle continued to speak to himself and rubbed his upper thigh that started to feel numb by the cold weather. Even with all these clothes he barely felt any warmth anymore. Well he could’ve wear his modern Turtle Titan Outfit that stored heat, if it wasn’t full of vomit from that orphan child that ate too many cookies. He half-smiled at the memory of today’s events. Since he had suggested to pay the orphanage a visit last year, when he had adopted Klunk, the Justice Force – especially Silver Sentry – decided to repeat this charity event. So today before Christmas Eve he and the other superheroes went to make the children happy and boy did they enjoy that. He had to beg Splinter for permission and promised to come home at eight so they wouldn’t have to wait for him so long again. Still it was amazing and tomorrow morning, after they opened their presents, all of their friends would come to visit. Everything seemed like this year the holidays would be full of joy and peace. And Mikey had kept his promise. He really did! It just didn’t include that he actually had to STAY at home after he came back. So when dinner was over and the lair quiet – he had already excused himself more or less credible – he snuck out.  
And now, well, he sat here. In his old selfmade Turtle Titan costume, the red cape, brown boots and gloves plus a thick pair of black pants. Waiting for something to happen, like it usually did if everything went too well for too long. But nothing happened. It was just dark, cold and boring out here.  
  
Sulking, Mikey looked at his phone again. Midnight. Well if now wasn’t the perfect time for his good old turtle luck, then when else? If not … he had to sneak back home with his tail between his legs, admitting he had been wrong and his brothers telling him “We told you so” and how stupid his plan was. Raph would probably laugh at his despair … or smack him. And his father might give him that look you get when there were no words needed but you could still tell he wasn’t pleased. Like “I’m not angry, just disappointed”  
Yet all Mikey wanted to prove was the existence of Santa Clause or some other entity, Christmas spirit or whatever that typical thing it was you read and watched stories about. It wasn’t that erroneous! After all the adventures they witnessed like time travel, aliens, mystical worlds and powers there should be a possibility. Something that … really fulfilled wishes. Well not every wish but … Ugh, who was he kidding?  
Anyway, nobody would’ve known if Raph hadn’t caught him. It was already the beginning of December and Mikey still didn’t bother anyone of his family to buy, build or get him the stuff he oh so deeply wanted as presents for Christmas. No bargain, no begging, nagging nor an endless wish list. And Donnie had already been suspicious since Halloween was over. Therefore his older red clad brother that liked to tease Mikey as much as Mikey loved top prank Raph, caught him while he was trying to write something that could mayyybe a letter to the old immortal guy with a long beard. And man, Mikey hasn’t heard Raph laugh this loud and long in a while. It wasn’t very funny anymore when Leo and Donnie joined the party and tried to get an explanation for Mikeys behavior since he never wrote a letter, especially to ‘Santa’ and … things ended with the youngest sulking like now and locking himself in his room for the rest of the day. He gave up trying to explain or to make up excuses because he just couldn’t get himself to tell the full truth. His brothers tried to address the topic a few more times for about a week but Michelangelo played it off or ignored the intentions completely. He thought they forgot about it. At least till he overheard a conversation between Donnie and Raph and the latter gruffed something about how Mikey shouldn’t dare to complain if he won’t get what he really wanted as a present. Mikey was okay with that. He could live with that! Wasn’t like he would get it anyway …  
  
Mikey sighed heavily and pulled the letter out of his belt, staring blankly at it. He just didn’t know how or what else to do. He wasn’t the type for deep talking with his family and dealing with this problem.  


_“Dear Santa or … well, you know who or what I mean._  
  
_Maybe you’re wondering why I never wrote a letter to you. Truth is I don’t really do too so … well, it’s pretty bad with sending mail down here and my brothers already told me you don’t exist when I was ten years old but …_  
  
_Okay I’ll just start over from the beginning (not really good at this stuff but I’m kinda desperate right now)._  
_Last year was hard. Okay the years before and our life in general has never been easy to begin with but even if so many awesome things happened since we first went to the surface, like me adopting my little furrball Klunk, making new friends and see new places … with Shredder and the Foot and all those other challenges … it’s so exhausting. Even I can tell that the atmosphere at home is so much heavier now. We all ignore it, pretend like nothing changed. But it did._  
_All I want is a prove that you exist. That there really is some kind of physical hope and a possibility to wish for something like a miracle. You know, like shooting stars, blowing out Birthday candles and such. I know you are there somewhere! Even if it’s childish or naïve but I just can’t …_  
_My family is not the ‚live in the present and don’t be so uptight all the time’ type._  
  
_Like Leo who’s constantly on guard, training and strict with himself. He always thinks he isn’t good enough and attempts to become more perfect, a better leader. He just won’t see that he already IS perfect! The perfect big brother! You can always count on him and he’s so great if he’s not just the boring disciplined fearless leader. And he’s always there for me when I need him. He knows me better than I know myself. Everything he’s doing he does it for us. I wished he would finally stop being so hard on himself and enjoy life from time to time, smiling and laughing more and just be a teenager. Lastly he looked way older than he is after his excessive mediation sessions. I’m worried his behavior at the farm after we had lost to Shredder won’t be the last time._  
  
_And Raph, he’s so damn cool. Don’t tell him but since I’ve been a Turtle tot he was my superhero idol. He’s always so brave and strong. Even if we tease each other a lot I know I can rely on him whenever I need him. Man was I jealous when we found that magical suit that gave him super powers. He has a heart of gold and if so selfless, he’d be such a great hero if he wanted to, fighting and protecting everyone with his life. And yet he thinks he’s too WEAK! Can you believe that? Of course he only talked to Casey about his worries, if he actually admits them. I know I annoy him. A lot. But that’s my job as a little brother. Well he doesn’t have to open up to me. I just wished he wouldn’t doubt himself that much or think he’s a monster. He may be Mr. Grumpy but there is so much more to him that he can’t see with this stubborn big head of his._  
  
_Then there is Donnie. We’re totally different, like Yin and Yang as Splinter mentioned once. He’s the logical and rational guy while I’m the creative and crazy one. Still, even if I bother him just as much and … break a lot of his stuff … we’re best friends after all. Usually I can also talk to him about anything and he knows and helps me and all that but … sometimes I think it’s not nearly even half the other way around. He doesn’t talk to me about his thoughts as much as I do. It’s not just because of his nature, he just … I don’t know, maybe he thinks I couldn’t understand him. That nobody of us truly understands him. We owe him so much, we were done for without him and I guess we don’t appreciate him enough for that. Electricity, medics, technology, everything thanks to him. I wished I knew a way how to thank him. How to make him understand, even if I’m not as smart as him, he still can talk to me. He works too much and locks himself in his lab._  
  
_Lastly Splinter, my dad. He’s a great and awesome teacher and an even greater father figure even if I sometimes liked for him to show more of his soft and caring father side than the strict sensei. I know he has his reasons and he wants for us to become strong and independent to survive in this hard world. Still I miss the old times when he used to be bigger than us. He sang me lullabies when I had nightmares and all these little things … he aged a lot way too fast throughout our adventures and fights. Maybe I just noticed it now because we haven’t had the chance to spend quality family time together in a while now. The thought that scares me the most lately is that he won’t be around us forever. At least he reminds us of that fact occasionally at practice. Could be the main reason I’m doing this right now._  
_He often talks with his former master Hamato Yoshi. He even got a present from him for Christmas once, as I found out! If that isn’t mystic and magical I don’t know, dude._  
_I can’t turn back time and that wouldn’t be the right thing anyway but … I really wish we can have dad around for a really long time and that he doesn’t have to worry that much about us and we can spent more time together as a family (man, Leo’s right, I am the sensitive guy here … damn)._  
  
_And me? Uh … yeah, there are a lot of things I want to have but right now at the moment … that’s what bothers me the most right now. I even made a couple of presents all by myself for my family but … dunno I’m not that good like Donnie. We shall live, fight and die together. As brothers. As a family._  
_And I can’t shake this feeling off, we missed to show how much we mean to each other. I love my family and friends. And I love to be a Turtle. I can’t change that the others aren’t as positive and optimistic as I am but … Maybe with a little help from you … Well, they could understand? At least get a little impression?_  
  
_To make it short, what I wish for Christmas: No matter how difficult and hard next year will be. No matter what miss fortune offers us. Please let my family be happy. Let them realize how important it is … to … I don’t know. Am I just selfish? Wow, this letter didn’t go as I planned. I … sometimes I think that I might need my family more than they probably need me, you know? I can’t shake this feeling off, it’s just there! I feel as if I’m the only one who can’t even bear the thought of being alone, total silence or leaving this city. Raph always talks about how sick he is of all the hiding here and Leo’s annoying him, while Leo rather liked to go back to Japan and train with the ancient one. Donnie never really complains, but I bet if he had the chance he’d definitely go with Leatherhead and the Utroms. They could achieve so much! And he would finally have someone to talk about everything that’s going on in that smart head of his. All of them maybe had a better life elsewhere._  
_Me? It hurts to admit, but the title of Battle Nexus Champion and being a real super hero isn’t that important to me after all, because I’d still be alo –“_  


Mikey put the letter back in his belt. Blowing out a huge puff of air in frustration while he rubbed his forehead. Just what was he doing right now? He sounded like a whiny little kid. That was more of a diary page than a letter or wish list. Why was he doing that stupid shit again?  
So many things happened throughout the last two and a half years. They travelled in different dimensions, fighting Shredder, travelling into the future, fighting evil clones of themselves that totally didn’t know how to behave like a family, The whole Ninja Tribunal thing, Casey and April lived together in an apartment, ENGAGED since their anniversary, Splinter always mentioned to retire and he’s getting too old for almost everything, yadda yadda … So many stuff happened!  
Well who knows, in the end he might have just made all this up because of some sleepless night. That means, if it wasn’t because of those nightmares. Just one evening, when you’re laying wide awake in your bed, not able to sleep and all those negative thoughts you usually ignored or totally forgot just suddenly started to hit you again and won’t leave you alone … All those daydreams, memories and stupid scary paranoid depressing pictures that suddenly drowned your mind and the quiet darkness becomes unbearable to just shove it off with gaming, reading comics, drawing or writing.  
When Mikey wasn’t able to sleep it was different than throughout the day. He just couldn’t find a way to brighten up this dark world around him. To highlight the little great things that his family often forgot or just didn’t notice. He was paying attention! It just … never occurred to him why he shouldn’t make it more friendly. Well, what could he say? He was an extrovert! He loved being a ninja but all this constant silence, darkness and serious façade just didn’t suit him. It was just the way he is and that’s all there is to it. But he was fine with it. Their team was balanced, everyone had his role. And even if sometimes he wished to be more like his brothers, he never actually wanted to switch with them. They also had their inner demons. He liked how he was and he didn’t care if that wasn’t the perfect ninja, warrior or whatever attitude. But … he was such a coward, weak, helpless, not independent, irresponsible idiot. Exactly that sentence echoed in his head at night. Pestering him. For weeks now.  
  
Why was all this bothering him now since the beginning of December? Why on Christmas, the family friendliest holiday ever? He was out here, when he could just go home sitting with said family, more questions than answers in his mind with so much dissatisfaction and searching for SOMETHING else than himself that could give him hope and optimism, new energy for the coming year! If he had at least one proof this maybe would help him get rid of these negative emotions that he despised so much.  
  
  
“I’m an idiot”, he lectured himself out loud and tried to stand up with his numb legs to not freeze completely. Of course solutions to this kind of problems didn’t come with such childish, stupid and naïve wishes. Searching for some real Christmas spirit in shape of a physical figure was nonsense. Nobody could ever free him from these shadows that followed him with every step and the more he ignored them, tried to keep his positive side, his inner shining light, the more those shadows grew and only waited for the night and perhaps his dreams to come haunt him because eventually Mikey wasn’t able to repress them. Nobody had only good times nor emotions. Darkness always existed and is a part of you, he wasn’t that dump. He just not as cryptic in describing them like Splinter. He knew that! Still, why was it so hard? Why couldn’t he repress? Why was it there? Why did it hurt every time he read these lines in this stupid worn out letter that was good for nothing anyway?!  
  
No Santa, no fairy, no shooting star, nothing was out there yet he refused to stop dreaming and believing … what else could he do? He was just a child that was not able to handle cruel cold reality like the rest of his family. He was not capable to survive – okay, he was perhaps, but he didn’t WANT to – he was just Mikey. Michelangelo the idiot with more Turtle luck than brain. Not really something that like … would make his dad proud or him equal with his brothers.  
  
  
The cogitating orange banded Turtle was about to give up and leave the building, when a sudden noise made him pause, his ninja senses and gut feeling on alert.

**Author's Note:**

> I know, Christmas is already over and I'm late for everything. Well since school is a pain in the ass right now I might propably take till next Christmas ... ugh x.x  
> Anyway I wasn't really sure if should post stuff here, since english is not my main language and I never wrote an actual TMNT 2003 fanfiction. But I finally gathered enough courage to try! I am really sorry if I made errors though.
> 
> Hope you enjoyed it and have a great day :)


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